The past couple of days have been a case of “have my monthlies started yet” every time I went to the loo, and as usual they have played hide and seek with me up until this afternoon. The period pains have been present since Thursday evening and so has the spotting, but lo and behold because I wanted them to start at the end of last week, they decided to start today.
The reason I wanted them to start last week is that they put a real downer on the week and I wanted to start this week cheerfully, but no, it is not to be.
At present I am sitting in bed having taken a couple of Co-codamol’s at 7pm and they have only dulled the pain. I am about to take another couple and try and get some sleep with my trusty electric blanket which helps with the cramping a little bit.
The only good thing is that I have managed to have lost 2lbs this week so it only leaves 7lbs to go to get to target for my IVF meeting at the end of the month, that is the bad news, it is just over a fortnight until my meeting, so if anyone has any bright ideas on how I can lose this weight in a fortnight then please let me know. I am at the moment drinking gallons of water and only eating meat and fruit in the hope that this will help.
Most of the day I have been crying for what I can’t have. No matter what I try and do I never get pregnant, I have been trying for over 11 years now and I am beginning to lose all hope. My depression and appeared in full force and all I want to do is go to sleep and not wake up until I am pregnant.
I am well and truly fed up of feeling unwell and having nothing to look forward to. All I want is a baby and it looks like my only hopes are going to be going through IVF treatment.
With my health as it is I am not sure my body will cope with the drugs and the stress of IVF but it is something I am going to have to deal with if I want a baby.
This cycle was the last chance I had of falling pregnant before my IVF treatment began and I feel like I have let hubby down in a big way. I have eaten healthily and tried to exercise (although having a migraine for two weeks made it difficult).
I am terrified of the injections I will have to do on a daily basis for the IVF so again if anyone has any tips please let me know (I am sure they won’t be as bad I think they will be).
As for now I suppose I had better take some more painkillers and hope that the crampings will have calmed down after a good night’s sleep, although I am not going to hold my breath as they usually last a couple of days.
I will post the review on knitting dvd’s over the next couple of days once these dreaded cramps have gone and I also have not knitting and spinning news to tell you in the next post.