I’m sorry for being MIA the past couple of months but things have been really difficult for me.
Firstly my heath has been up and down and so has my depression which has made it virtually impossible for me to concentrate on anything, especially writing.
Then my eldest dog “Fred” was diagnosed with Lymphoma (Cancer). He was 14 years old and had a good life, but the news hit me really hard.
Then I had a suspected miscarriage. I say suspected as I didn’t get around to doing a pregnancy test as I did not want to jinx it. I had all of the usual pregnancy symptoms which included various smells making me feel nauseous and of course the morning sickness which lasted all day and not just in the morning. A fortnight later I had the usual miscarriage bleeding, pains and the passing of a little grey sac (sorry for TMI).
We took Fred to the vets for a biopsy, ultrasounds and blood tests and were told that there was pretty much not a lot that could be done as it was Stage 4 Lymphoma.
Last week I went away on holiday with my parents and my husband to Jersey. It was to celebrate my dad being 65 and we were the official tour guides and chauffers. We had a good time despite trying to get over the miscarriage and the news of Fred’s Cancer.
My father-in-law was looking after my 3 dogs (including Fred) and we phoned up mid-week to make sure that everything was ok. We got home on Sunday evening and was very surprised and shocked to see that Fred had deteoriated so much. We had not been told of this when we phoned . He was hobbling around and had lost soooo much weight and was literally skin and bones.
On Monday morning my husband woke me up and said that Fred had collapsed on his side outside whilst doing his business and we both agreed that it was time to telephone the vets to have him put to sleep as we did not want to see him in anymore pain.
I telephoned the vets straight away and an appointment was made for 2.40pm, so I telephoned my father to ask him to make a coffin for Fred and my husband went to dig a hole in the garden. An hour later my father arrived with the coffin and we sat on the patio having a cup of tea. Fred was lying on the patio behind us and we thought he was just chilling out.
When my father left I went inside to get ready as the vets was a 45 minute drive away. When I came out to tell my husband that it was time for us to leave I noticed that my youngest dog “Dino” was sitting with Fred on the patio and Fred was making a funny noise. I assumed that it was because Dino was sitting there so I shooed Dino away. Fred was still making the noise so I bent down and that is when I noticed that there was a pool of blood underneath Fred’s head and blood was coming out of his nose and mouth.
I called my husband over and showed him and we quickly got in the car and took him to the local vets which was 5 minutes away. By the time we got him into the vets he had already passed away. The vet gave him a small injection to make sure that he had gone and gave us a few minutes with him.
The vet was really nice and we said that we would be taking him home to bury him in the garden.
Once we got home we wrapped him up in his towel and had a little funeral for him.
The past few days has been really difficult as the other 2 dogs are missing him and keep looking around the house and garden for Fred. It is really upsetting to see Fred’s brother “Barney” looking for him as they were always asleep together and had been together all of their lives.
At the moment Barney and Dino are being spoilt rotten and they are both very clingy with me and won’t leave my side for too long. I am sure things will begin to get back to normal a bit more in a couple of weeks, but we will never forget Fred.